Landing on a different planet, and finding it feels like home

So here is China from the perspective of someone on a business delegation: touch down in Beijing. Be greeted by English-speakers, who lead you onto a bus, which brings you to a fancy hotel where the staff speak English and the breakfast includes Rice Krispies and omelettes. Spend the next day driving around the bus speaking to people from B.C. about things in B.C. Overhear someone talking about his booking for a date with his girlfriend in Tofino, and his time on the West Coast trail. Keep your BlackBerry close at hand, because the e-mails still demand a response. Do a few meet-and-greets with Chinese people who speak English, or have interpreters. Smile for pictures. Get back on the bus and head to the airport. Check in, with people who speak English. Grab a Heineken in the lobby, then board the plane. Eat airplane food -- beef and rice -- then nap before touchdown again, another bus, another trip to a fancy hotel. Don't bother checking in, because that's been done for you. Grab your room key from your English-speaking logistics person, then head out to an Irish pub -- the Shamrock, which happens to have a Vegas theme that includes a little white wedding chapel replica -- and drink Heineken and order spicy pizza. Head back to the hotel, get on the Internet and check e-mail, the news, plus your stocks. Glance out the window and see a bunch of tall buildings with signs in English.

Wonder, at the end of the day, whether you're in China, or maybe just Richmond.